D.A.R.E., the ineffective anti-drug program you barely remember from elementary school, is still around, and still warning kids of the dangers of taking any drug in any amount ever. Especially a new and deadly marijuana gummy that was completely made up by a fake news site whose story D.A.R.E. republished in its entirety.

No, weed candies called “Uncle Tweety’s Chewy Flippers” and “Gummy Satans” did not claim nine college students’ lives in Colorado or kill 12 people at Coachella. And it’s certainly not true that “for every one joint of marijuana, four teenagers become burdened with pregnancy”—but the story sounds scary, so D.A.R.E. ran it, even though they should know better.

The article came from Topekas News—a source so reliable that it currently has a story on its front page about old McDonald’s food coming to life and growing legs—and cited a Huffington Post article that doesn’t actually exist.

When Washington Post blogger Christopher Ingraham asked D.A.R.E. about the obviously bogus gummy scare, they didn’t respond, just took the article down. Fortunately, Ingraham saved a copy, so we can still enjoy bogus statistics like “for every bag of marijuana candy sold, 16 violent crimes in the 18-45 age group break down.”

D.A.R.E’s current curriculum, introduced in 2009, is called “keepin’ it REAL.”

[H/T Washington Post Wonkblog, Photo: D.A.R.E. via Washington Post]